April 22, 2026
EP 048 10 Brutal Truths About Success Mindset Habits Your 20s Won't Teach
Harvard researchers studying 12,000+ people found 90% of adults carry severe regrets—peaking in career, relationships, health, and money. In this episode, discover the 10 brutal truths about success mindset habits most people ignore in their 20s until it's too late. Ace Allan reveals the compound effect that makes your 20s the most critical decade for wealth and productivity habits, the invisible programming driving self-sabotage, and the achieving success habits that separate remarkable success from mediocrity. Learn what your brain doesn't want you to know—while you still have time to change course. https://YourSuccessDNA.com
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Harvard researchers studying over
12,000 people discovered that 90%
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of adults carry severe life regrets
according to research published in the
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Frontiers of Psychology, and I'm about
to share with you 10 truths that most
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people do not learn in their thirties
or forties, or even in retirement,
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but environ, and then it's too late.
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These regrets tend to peak around the
exact same categories every single time.
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Career, relationships, health and money.
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And if you're in your twenties right now
or if you know someone who is, this might
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be the most important episode that you
hear this year because the person you're
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becoming right now is being shaped by
invisible beliefs and limiting beliefs.
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You have probably never even
examined the beliefs you didn't
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choose, and those inherited beliefs.
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About to cost you years of your life,
your success, DNA podcast, your success.
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Is in your DNA.
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What is up?
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What is up?
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What the hell is up?
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My fellow success secrets.
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Welcome back to another
episode of Your success, DNA.
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You know why you're here?
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I know why you're here.
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Today.
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We're talking about the 10 harsh
truths that will save your twenties,
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and really this is all about the
regrets that 90% of the people
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carry and how you can avoid them.
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So there's three things we're gonna
make sure you walk away with today.
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First, we're gonna be diving into the
compound effect that makes your twenties.
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The most critical decade for wealth
building and, and life building for
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that matter, and why 53% of Gen Z
isn't even participating in the game.
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That will determine their
future and the outcome.
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Second, we're gonna be revealing the
invisible programming that's making
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you chase goals that are not even your
goals, and the one question that will
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shatter the illusion and show you what
you actually want versus what you're told.
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You should want.
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And third, we're gonna be exposing
the performance trap that's keeping
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you lonely, even when you're
surrounded by a room full of people.
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And why the thing you think will
get you rejected is actually the
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key to some genuine connections.
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Okay, here's something that's probably
gonna stay with you for the rest of
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the day, so go ahead and lean in here.
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Gimme a little bit more of your intention.
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Every single thing you are
currently stressed out about.
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The career you're trying to
build that relationship, you're
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trying to freaking figure out
the money you're trying to make.
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It's all being shaped by invisible
beliefs and limiting beliefs
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that you never even chose.
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Beliefs that you've absorbed from your
parents, from culture, from your social
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media, feed, just from everywhere.
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And those inherited beliefs are
costing you years, not months, years.
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Lemme tell you about two people I know.
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Both of them, 34 years old, both
started their careers at the same time.
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Same company, same salary, same
opportunity, same everything.
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Person A spent their twenties
following the quote unquote right path.
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They climbed the ladder, they got the
promotions, they bought the house.
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They ticked every single
one of those success boxes.
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You might say.
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Today they make six figures
and they feel completely empty.
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They lie awake at night
wondering, this is it.
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Yeah, they've built someone
else's definition of success
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and they called it their own.
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Now let's look over at person
B. They spent their twenties
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questioning everything.
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They left that quote unquote safe job
at 26 to start a business that failed.
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Then another one that barely broke even
they lived in a studio apartment while
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their friends were out there buying
houses, but they were building something.
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Aligned with who they actually were.
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Their iki guy, which is
their true purpose today.
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They run a company they love,
they work from anywhere they want
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to, and they wake up every single
morning excited about their life.
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The difference here, it, it wasn't
talent, it wasn't luck, and it
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certainly wasn't connections.
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The difference was that person B. Learn
the 10 truths early enough to act on them.
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The 10 truths we're gonna talk about
here, person A well, person A is still
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learning them now and they're paying that
compound cost of waiting to learn them.
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Okay?
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So let me walk you through the
10 truths that separate those
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who thrive in their twenties.
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From those who are just out
there trying to survive them.
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Truth number one, your twenties
matter more for wealth building and
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future building than any other decade.
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And, and, and it's not even close.
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And here's some math that will
actually change your life.
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Put $10,000 into a 401k or a Roth IRA,
uh, in your twenties with a 6% return
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and that one single deposit grow.
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Over $57,000 in 30 years.
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Even if you don't add another
penny, time will do all the work.
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But here's the problem.
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Only 47% of the Gen Z out there
have a retirement plan compared
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to 75% of the millennials.
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That's a big gap.
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55% of young adults don't have enough
money to get through an emergency.
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They don't have enough emergency savings
to cover three months of expenses.
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The compound effect here
works for you, and guess what?
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Yeah, it works against you.
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Here's the thing, it never stops
working in either direction.
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Truth number two, you don't
actually know what you want.
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You know what you're told.
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You want, most of you know what
you're chasing, and most of you are.
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What you're chasing right now are things
like the job title, that relationship
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milestone, the lifestyle, and they're
all things you probably did not choose.
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You absorbed it.
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Here's the question that
breaks that illusion.
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If no one ever knew, if there were no
Instagram, there were no family dinners,
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there were no freaking friends out there
turn press, would you still want this?
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Whatever.
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This is that thing you're chasing.
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And if the answer is no, you don't
want that thing, you want the
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reaction of getting that thing.
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Proof my friends is not purpose.
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Truth number three, the person you're
pretending to be is costing you everything
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about the person you actually are.
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Could have let that sink in for a second.
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You've constructed a quote unquote
approved version of yourself that
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you present to the world, right?
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To those family dinners, to your parents.
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When you go visit them to the
Instagram and Facebook posts.
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The armor worked.
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It kept you safe.
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It's getting you accepted.
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But the armor doesn't just
keep the bad things out.
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It keeps everything out.
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I mean, everything.
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That means things like connection,
recognition and opportunities
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that could reach the real to you.
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Ah, think about that.
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Truth number four, discipline is
not forcing you to do hard things.
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It's disappointing.
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The wrong things.
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Yeah.
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Every day you have a finite amount of
energy and a finite amount of willpower.
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I don't care what anyone tells you.
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The person who spends their morning
resisting the snooze button, deciding
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what to wear, answering non-urgent emails
and scrolling notifications endlessly
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arrives at their most important work.
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With an empty tank, you don't
have a discipline problem.
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You have an allocation problem,
and I've talked about this in
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a couple episodes previous.
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Go back and check 'em out.
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This is what James Clear
calls the aggression of
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margin calls in atomic habits.
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It's small decisions that
compound into massive results.
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Truth number five, the people you
spend time with aren't influencing you.
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No, no, no.
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They are programming you.
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According to the research of Nicholas
Christus and James Fowler published
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in a New England Journal of Medicine
back in 2007, if a close friend
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becomes obese, your likelihood
to become beast goes up by 57%.
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It's not because they're out
there convincing you to eat more.
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No, but because their behavior
unconsciously recalibrates your sense of
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normal, your environment isn't backdrop.
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It's really an operating system.
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Truth number six, being busy is about
the laziest thing that you can do.
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Anyone can fill up a schedule.
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We've seen lots of people do it.
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You maybe me.
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I know I have.
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Being busy requires no
thought, no strategy.
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And absolutely no courage.
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Yeah, you just say yes to whatever
shows up and you go and you do it.
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Being effective.
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On the other hand, that starts to
actually move the needle, and it
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requires you to think, requires you
to choose, and it's gonna require
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you to disappoint a few people.
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Even the ones you may love dearly
busyness is a hiding place from the
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things that you, my friend, are avoiding.
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Truth number seven, you will not
be rewarded for your suffering.
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I'm sorry.
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I don't care how biblical it might be.
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You're not being crucified
on the cross and you're not.
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You're not that guy.
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Somewhere in your programming is the
belief that if you endure enough, if
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you sacrifice enough, the universe
will notice and will reward you.
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This belief, my friend,
is ruining your life.
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Some suffering is avoidable.
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I get it.
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Loss grief.
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The genuine pain is of just being alive.
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That's a part of adulting.
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Get over it.
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But the suffering you manufacture
by staying in things that just
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are not working, that is optional.
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Truth number eight, your
twenties are not a rehearsal.
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They are a live performance.
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And your audience, your
audience is your thirties.
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I have time is not a fact that
you should be operating from, it's
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a sedative that you are taking.
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Your thirties are not a new chapter.
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They are the consequences
of your twenties.
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The compounding curve is nearly invisible
in your twenties, but by, by the time
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you reach 35, it's very noticeable.
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At 45, it becomes a bit of a canyon.
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This is the power of delayed
gratification that researchers like
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Walter Michel demonstrate an in the
now famous marshmallow experiment.
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Truth number nine, the relationship
you have with yourself.
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It's a blueprint for every
relationship you will ever have.
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If you don't trust yourself,
you're gonna attract people
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who reinforce that distrust.
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Your tolerance for mistreatment is
calibrated to your own self-worth.
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You'll accept from others
what you believe you deserve.
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Yourself and what you believe you
deserve was set long before any
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relationship you currently have began.
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This is where developing a gross mindset
as Carol Dweck research shows becomes
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crucial for breaking those patterns.
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And truth number 10.
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This is not the best for last, but this
is definitely one worth listening to.
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You will not figure out your life.
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No, I'm sorry to tell you.
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I'm gonna be the bear of bad news.
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You will, however, build it.
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You are trying to figure out your
life like it's some sort of puzzle
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and all the pieces exist somewhere.
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That's not how it works.
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The self isn't discovered
through thinking.
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It's discovered through doing and
then thinking you don't need a plan.
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You need to practice, okay?
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And if these drew are, are
hitting you, maybe like a truck
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right now, you're not alone.
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This is exactly why I created the
Unleash Your Success DNA newsletter.
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It's for my aspiring folks out there.
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My success seekers, aspiring
entrepreneurs, nine to five escapees.
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Folks like you are listening all the
way this far, who are tired of living
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someone else's definition of success.
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Each issue delivers mindset shifts and
habit upgrades, all with that little
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dose of rebellion to help you break free
from the convention and build a life
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aligned with your version of success.
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No fluff, no generic advice, just
truth telling, guidance that you
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need to stop wasting your twenties
and start building your freedom.
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Go ahead and sign up
now@yoursuccessdna.com
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because your future self.
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Is counting on to decisions
that you're gonna make today.
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So here's why I think this matters
beyond just personal development,
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self-improvement, and self-help.
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We're living through the greatest
transfer of opportunity in human history.
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The old rules, you know, go to college,
get a job, cleanse a ladder, retire at 65.
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They're busted, they're
broken, they're gone.
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Just throwing them run out the window.
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The new economy rewards.
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00:10:32,804 --> 00:10:35,047
Those who think a little
differently, act a little more
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00:10:35,047 --> 00:10:37,969
boldly and build their own path.
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00:10:38,204 --> 00:10:40,630
But most people that are in their
twenties right now are still playing
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by the old rules while the game is
completely changed under their feet.
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They're optimizing for a security
in a world that rewards agility.
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Ability.
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00:10:49,195 --> 00:10:52,404
They're seeking approval In a world
that rewards authenticity, they're
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following blueprints In a world
that rewards innovation, the bigger
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00:10:56,447 --> 00:11:00,700
paradigm is your twenties are when
you either learn to think for yourself
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or learn to spend the rest of your
life thinking like everyone else.
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And there are devices in our hands
nowadays that are helping you with
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the ladder far more than the former.
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The choice you make determines
not just your success.
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But ultimately I think your freedom.
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00:11:13,460 --> 00:11:15,182
So here's your Whiskered
wisdom for this week.
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The most dangerous lie your
brain will tell you in your
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00:11:18,156 --> 00:11:19,878
twenties is you have time.
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Time is not a renewable force, my friends.
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It is the only currency
that really matters.
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00:11:24,860 --> 00:11:28,330
So here's your action step forth this
week, tonight, before you go to bed,
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00:11:28,539 --> 00:11:33,026
write down three things you are currently
doing that you know are not serving.
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00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:33,986
Your future self.
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00:11:34,195 --> 00:11:34,795
Three things.
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00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:37,952
Maybe you're tolerating, three
things you're avoiding, and or
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00:11:37,952 --> 00:11:41,291
three things that you're postponing,
then tomorrow disappoint.
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00:11:41,343 --> 00:11:42,830
One of those three things.
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00:11:42,986 --> 00:11:44,969
Say no, walk away or start.
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00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:49,195
The goal here is to stop participating
in your own diminishment.
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00:11:49,300 --> 00:11:53,213
Your twenties are gonna end whether
you use them or whether you waste them.
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The only question is, will
you look back with pride?
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00:11:56,700 --> 00:11:57,743
Oh, you look back with regret.
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00:11:57,900 --> 00:12:01,969
Listen, every single person who's built
something meaningful had to face each of
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00:12:01,969 --> 00:12:03,821
these truths at some point in their life.
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00:12:04,004 --> 00:12:06,456
The only difference between
those who thrive and those who
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00:12:06,456 --> 00:12:08,517
survive is when they face them.
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Period.
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End story, hard.
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00:12:10,447 --> 00:12:11,334
Stop, mic drop.
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00:12:11,726 --> 00:12:15,326
You can face them now in your twenties
when you still have time to course
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00:12:15,326 --> 00:12:18,926
correct, or you could face them later,
your thirties, your forties, your
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00:12:18,926 --> 00:12:23,100
fifties, when the compounding cost
of waiting has already been paid.
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00:12:23,282 --> 00:12:25,760
The choice is yours,
but choose consciously.
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00:12:26,026 --> 00:12:29,678
Choose wisely because not
choosing well, as we all know,
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00:12:29,939 --> 00:12:30,982
it's really still the choice.
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00:12:31,139 --> 00:12:34,765
It's just choosing to let life
happen to you instead of creating
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00:12:34,765 --> 00:12:36,513
the life that you actually want.
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00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:40,060
The one that you dream and
desire, and I think you deserve
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00:12:40,373 --> 00:12:41,547
your future self is watching.
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00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:42,460
Make them proud.
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00:12:42,460 --> 00:12:45,330
And with that, I'm gonna leave
you as I always do, think
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successfully and take action.
00:00:00,260 --> 00:00:04,669
Harvard researchers studying over
12,000 people discovered that 90%
2
00:00:04,669 --> 00:00:08,452
of adults carry severe life regrets
according to research published in the
3
00:00:08,452 --> 00:00:12,678
Frontiers of Psychology, and I'm about
to share with you 10 truths that most
4
00:00:12,678 --> 00:00:16,721
people do not learn in their thirties
or forties, or even in retirement,
5
00:00:16,826 --> 00:00:18,547
but environ, and then it's too late.
6
00:00:18,834 --> 00:00:23,817
These regrets tend to peak around the
exact same categories every single time.
7
00:00:24,086 --> 00:00:26,773
Career, relationships, health and money.
8
00:00:27,008 --> 00:00:30,765
And if you're in your twenties right now
or if you know someone who is, this might
9
00:00:30,765 --> 00:00:34,860
be the most important episode that you
hear this year because the person you're
10
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:38,982
becoming right now is being shaped by
invisible beliefs and limiting beliefs.
11
00:00:38,982 --> 00:00:43,052
You have probably never even
examined the beliefs you didn't
12
00:00:43,052 --> 00:00:44,904
choose, and those inherited beliefs.
13
00:00:45,130 --> 00:00:50,686
About to cost you years of your life,
your success, DNA podcast, your success.
14
00:00:50,739 --> 00:00:51,891
Is in your DNA.
15
00:00:52,304 --> 00:00:52,773
What is up?
16
00:00:52,773 --> 00:00:53,191
What is up?
17
00:00:53,191 --> 00:00:53,739
What the hell is up?
18
00:00:53,739 --> 00:00:55,043
My fellow success secrets.
19
00:00:55,043 --> 00:00:57,286
Welcome back to another
episode of Your success, DNA.
20
00:00:57,313 --> 00:00:58,330
You know why you're here?
21
00:00:58,356 --> 00:00:59,373
I know why you're here.
22
00:00:59,504 --> 00:00:59,791
Today.
23
00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:03,600
We're talking about the 10 harsh
truths that will save your twenties,
24
00:01:03,652 --> 00:01:06,417
and really this is all about the
regrets that 90% of the people
25
00:01:06,417 --> 00:01:07,956
carry and how you can avoid them.
26
00:01:07,956 --> 00:01:10,773
So there's three things we're gonna
make sure you walk away with today.
27
00:01:10,773 --> 00:01:14,086
First, we're gonna be diving into the
compound effect that makes your twenties.
28
00:01:14,156 --> 00:01:17,652
The most critical decade for wealth
building and, and life building for
29
00:01:17,652 --> 00:01:22,556
that matter, and why 53% of Gen Z
isn't even participating in the game.
30
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:25,243
That will determine their
future and the outcome.
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Second, we're gonna be revealing the
invisible programming that's making
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00:01:28,869 --> 00:01:33,747
you chase goals that are not even your
goals, and the one question that will
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00:01:33,747 --> 00:01:38,160
shatter the illusion and show you what
you actually want versus what you're told.
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00:01:38,660 --> 00:01:39,417
You should want.
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00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:43,017
And third, we're gonna be exposing
the performance trap that's keeping
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00:01:43,017 --> 00:01:45,860
you lonely, even when you're
surrounded by a room full of people.
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00:01:46,069 --> 00:01:50,347
And why the thing you think will
get you rejected is actually the
38
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:52,434
key to some genuine connections.
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00:01:52,486 --> 00:01:56,034
Okay, here's something that's probably
gonna stay with you for the rest of
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00:01:56,034 --> 00:01:57,626
the day, so go ahead and lean in here.
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00:01:57,626 --> 00:01:58,904
Gimme a little bit more of your intention.
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00:01:59,113 --> 00:02:01,826
Every single thing you are
currently stressed out about.
43
00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:04,513
The career you're trying to
build that relationship, you're
44
00:02:04,513 --> 00:02:07,434
trying to freaking figure out
the money you're trying to make.
45
00:02:07,643 --> 00:02:10,826
It's all being shaped by invisible
beliefs and limiting beliefs
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00:02:10,826 --> 00:02:12,156
that you never even chose.
47
00:02:12,286 --> 00:02:15,678
Beliefs that you've absorbed from your
parents, from culture, from your social
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00:02:15,678 --> 00:02:17,452
media, feed, just from everywhere.
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00:02:17,530 --> 00:02:22,200
And those inherited beliefs are
costing you years, not months, years.
50
00:02:22,330 --> 00:02:23,113
Lemme tell you about two people I know.
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00:02:23,947 --> 00:02:27,443
Both of them, 34 years old, both
started their careers at the same time.
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00:02:27,573 --> 00:02:31,304
Same company, same salary, same
opportunity, same everything.
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00:02:31,539 --> 00:02:34,930
Person A spent their twenties
following the quote unquote right path.
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00:02:35,139 --> 00:02:37,800
They climbed the ladder, they got the
promotions, they bought the house.
55
00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:40,460
They ticked every single
one of those success boxes.
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00:02:40,956 --> 00:02:41,530
You might say.
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00:02:41,843 --> 00:02:45,600
Today they make six figures
and they feel completely empty.
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00:02:45,839 --> 00:02:47,926
They lie awake at night
wondering, this is it.
59
00:02:48,213 --> 00:02:51,265
Yeah, they've built someone
else's definition of success
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00:02:51,473 --> 00:02:52,569
and they called it their own.
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Now let's look over at person
B. They spent their twenties
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00:02:55,491 --> 00:02:56,900
questioning everything.
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00:02:57,134 --> 00:03:00,995
They left that quote unquote safe job
at 26 to start a business that failed.
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00:03:01,230 --> 00:03:05,065
Then another one that barely broke even
they lived in a studio apartment while
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00:03:05,065 --> 00:03:08,247
their friends were out there buying
houses, but they were building something.
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00:03:08,465 --> 00:03:11,073
Aligned with who they actually were.
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00:03:11,465 --> 00:03:14,960
Their iki guy, which is
their true purpose today.
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00:03:15,065 --> 00:03:17,752
They run a company they love,
they work from anywhere they want
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00:03:17,752 --> 00:03:21,978
to, and they wake up every single
morning excited about their life.
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The difference here, it, it wasn't
talent, it wasn't luck, and it
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certainly wasn't connections.
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The difference was that person B. Learn
the 10 truths early enough to act on them.
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The 10 truths we're gonna talk about
here, person A well, person A is still
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learning them now and they're paying that
compound cost of waiting to learn them.
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Okay?
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So let me walk you through the
10 truths that separate those
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who thrive in their twenties.
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From those who are just out
there trying to survive them.
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Truth number one, your twenties
matter more for wealth building and
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00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:53,960
future building than any other decade.
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And, and, and it's not even close.
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00:03:55,734 --> 00:03:57,508
And here's some math that will
actually change your life.
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00:03:57,743 --> 00:04:04,160
Put $10,000 into a 401k or a Roth IRA,
uh, in your twenties with a 6% return
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00:04:04,917 --> 00:04:07,004
and that one single deposit grow.
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00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:11,008
Over $57,000 in 30 years.
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Even if you don't add another
penny, time will do all the work.
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But here's the problem.
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00:04:15,286 --> 00:04:19,382
Only 47% of the Gen Z out there
have a retirement plan compared
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00:04:19,382 --> 00:04:21,234
to 75% of the millennials.
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00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:22,291
That's a big gap.
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00:04:22,656 --> 00:04:26,830
55% of young adults don't have enough
money to get through an emergency.
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They don't have enough emergency savings
to cover three months of expenses.
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The compound effect here
works for you, and guess what?
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Yeah, it works against you.
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Here's the thing, it never stops
working in either direction.
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Truth number two, you don't
actually know what you want.
97
00:04:42,317 --> 00:04:42,995
You know what you're told.
98
00:04:42,995 --> 00:04:45,839
You want, most of you know what
you're chasing, and most of you are.
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00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:49,308
What you're chasing right now are things
like the job title, that relationship
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00:04:49,308 --> 00:04:52,882
milestone, the lifestyle, and they're
all things you probably did not choose.
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00:04:52,882 --> 00:04:53,769
You absorbed it.
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00:04:54,104 --> 00:04:56,243
Here's the question that
breaks that illusion.
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If no one ever knew, if there were no
Instagram, there were no family dinners,
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00:05:00,704 --> 00:05:05,086
there were no freaking friends out there
turn press, would you still want this?
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00:05:05,086 --> 00:05:05,426
Whatever.
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00:05:05,426 --> 00:05:07,095
This is that thing you're chasing.
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And if the answer is no, you don't
want that thing, you want the
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00:05:10,773 --> 00:05:12,939
reaction of getting that thing.
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00:05:13,308 --> 00:05:15,552
Proof my friends is not purpose.
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00:05:15,604 --> 00:05:19,465
Truth number three, the person you're
pretending to be is costing you everything
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00:05:19,700 --> 00:05:21,682
about the person you actually are.
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00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:23,873
Could have let that sink in for a second.
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00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:27,447
You've constructed a quote unquote
approved version of yourself that
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00:05:27,447 --> 00:05:29,743
you present to the world, right?
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To those family dinners, to your parents.
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00:05:31,752 --> 00:05:34,569
When you go visit them to the
Instagram and Facebook posts.
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00:05:34,773 --> 00:05:35,556
The armor worked.
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It kept you safe.
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00:05:36,834 --> 00:05:38,191
It's getting you accepted.
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00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:40,721
But the armor doesn't just
keep the bad things out.
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00:05:40,852 --> 00:05:42,260
It keeps everything out.
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00:05:42,339 --> 00:05:43,173
I mean, everything.
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00:05:43,356 --> 00:05:47,713
That means things like connection,
recognition and opportunities
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00:05:47,895 --> 00:05:49,826
that could reach the real to you.
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00:05:49,930 --> 00:05:50,791
Ah, think about that.
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00:05:50,791 --> 00:05:54,521
Truth number four, discipline is
not forcing you to do hard things.
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It's disappointing.
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00:05:55,878 --> 00:05:56,869
The wrong things.
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00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:57,234
Yeah.
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00:05:57,313 --> 00:06:01,721
Every day you have a finite amount of
energy and a finite amount of willpower.
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I don't care what anyone tells you.
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The person who spends their morning
resisting the snooze button, deciding
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00:06:06,756 --> 00:06:11,034
what to wear, answering non-urgent emails
and scrolling notifications endlessly
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00:06:11,217 --> 00:06:13,095
arrives at their most important work.
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00:06:13,286 --> 00:06:16,417
With an empty tank, you don't
have a discipline problem.
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You have an allocation problem,
and I've talked about this in
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00:06:18,947 --> 00:06:19,939
a couple episodes previous.
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00:06:19,939 --> 00:06:20,721
Go back and check 'em out.
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This is what James Clear
calls the aggression of
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00:06:23,721 --> 00:06:25,521
margin calls in atomic habits.
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00:06:25,678 --> 00:06:28,913
It's small decisions that
compound into massive results.
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Truth number five, the people you
spend time with aren't influencing you.
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00:06:33,965 --> 00:06:34,878
No, no, no.
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00:06:35,113 --> 00:06:36,078
They are programming you.
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00:06:36,208 --> 00:06:40,434
According to the research of Nicholas
Christus and James Fowler published
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00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:44,113
in a New England Journal of Medicine
back in 2007, if a close friend
147
00:06:44,113 --> 00:06:48,782
becomes obese, your likelihood
to become beast goes up by 57%.
148
00:06:49,173 --> 00:06:51,417
It's not because they're out
there convincing you to eat more.
149
00:06:51,417 --> 00:06:57,182
No, but because their behavior
unconsciously recalibrates your sense of
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00:06:57,182 --> 00:06:59,400
normal, your environment isn't backdrop.
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00:06:59,608 --> 00:07:01,617
It's really an operating system.
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00:07:01,878 --> 00:07:04,982
Truth number six, being busy is about
the laziest thing that you can do.
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00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:06,313
Anyone can fill up a schedule.
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00:07:06,365 --> 00:07:07,513
We've seen lots of people do it.
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You maybe me.
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00:07:08,530 --> 00:07:09,156
I know I have.
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00:07:09,208 --> 00:07:12,234
Being busy requires no
thought, no strategy.
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00:07:12,508 --> 00:07:13,891
And absolutely no courage.
159
00:07:14,047 --> 00:07:16,969
Yeah, you just say yes to whatever
shows up and you go and you do it.
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00:07:17,152 --> 00:07:17,908
Being effective.
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00:07:17,908 --> 00:07:21,560
On the other hand, that starts to
actually move the needle, and it
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requires you to think, requires you
to choose, and it's gonna require
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00:07:24,952 --> 00:07:26,256
you to disappoint a few people.
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Even the ones you may love dearly
busyness is a hiding place from the
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things that you, my friend, are avoiding.
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Truth number seven, you will not
be rewarded for your suffering.
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I'm sorry.
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00:07:36,039 --> 00:07:37,317
I don't care how biblical it might be.
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00:07:37,317 --> 00:07:38,934
You're not being crucified
on the cross and you're not.
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You're not that guy.
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00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:43,652
Somewhere in your programming is the
belief that if you endure enough, if
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00:07:43,652 --> 00:07:47,408
you sacrifice enough, the universe
will notice and will reward you.
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00:07:47,591 --> 00:07:50,356
This belief, my friend,
is ruining your life.
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Some suffering is avoidable.
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00:07:51,765 --> 00:07:52,260
I get it.
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00:07:52,495 --> 00:07:53,434
Loss grief.
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00:07:53,565 --> 00:07:55,756
The genuine pain is of just being alive.
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That's a part of adulting.
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Get over it.
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00:07:57,830 --> 00:08:01,326
But the suffering you manufacture
by staying in things that just
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00:08:01,326 --> 00:08:03,360
are not working, that is optional.
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00:08:03,595 --> 00:08:05,813
Truth number eight, your
twenties are not a rehearsal.
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00:08:06,021 --> 00:08:07,665
They are a live performance.
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And your audience, your
audience is your thirties.
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I have time is not a fact that
you should be operating from, it's
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a sedative that you are taking.
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Your thirties are not a new chapter.
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They are the consequences
of your twenties.
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The compounding curve is nearly invisible
in your twenties, but by, by the time
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you reach 35, it's very noticeable.
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At 45, it becomes a bit of a canyon.
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This is the power of delayed
gratification that researchers like
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Walter Michel demonstrate an in the
now famous marshmallow experiment.
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Truth number nine, the relationship
you have with yourself.
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It's a blueprint for every
relationship you will ever have.
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If you don't trust yourself,
you're gonna attract people
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who reinforce that distrust.
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Your tolerance for mistreatment is
calibrated to your own self-worth.
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You'll accept from others
what you believe you deserve.
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Yourself and what you believe you
deserve was set long before any
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relationship you currently have began.
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This is where developing a gross mindset
as Carol Dweck research shows becomes
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crucial for breaking those patterns.
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And truth number 10.
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This is not the best for last, but this
is definitely one worth listening to.
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You will not figure out your life.
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No, I'm sorry to tell you.
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I'm gonna be the bear of bad news.
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You will, however, build it.
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You are trying to figure out your
life like it's some sort of puzzle
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and all the pieces exist somewhere.
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That's not how it works.
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The self isn't discovered
through thinking.
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It's discovered through doing and
then thinking you don't need a plan.
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You need to practice, okay?
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And if these drew are, are
hitting you, maybe like a truck
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right now, you're not alone.
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This is exactly why I created the
Unleash Your Success DNA newsletter.
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It's for my aspiring folks out there.
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My success seekers, aspiring
entrepreneurs, nine to five escapees.
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Folks like you are listening all the
way this far, who are tired of living
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someone else's definition of success.
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Each issue delivers mindset shifts and
habit upgrades, all with that little
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dose of rebellion to help you break free
from the convention and build a life
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aligned with your version of success.
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No fluff, no generic advice, just
truth telling, guidance that you
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need to stop wasting your twenties
and start building your freedom.
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Go ahead and sign up
now@yoursuccessdna.com
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because your future self.
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Is counting on to decisions
that you're gonna make today.
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So here's why I think this matters
beyond just personal development,
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self-improvement, and self-help.
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We're living through the greatest
transfer of opportunity in human history.
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The old rules, you know, go to college,
get a job, cleanse a ladder, retire at 65.
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They're busted, they're
broken, they're gone.
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Just throwing them run out the window.
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The new economy rewards.
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Those who think a little
differently, act a little more
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boldly and build their own path.
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But most people that are in their
twenties right now are still playing
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by the old rules while the game is
completely changed under their feet.
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They're optimizing for a security
in a world that rewards agility.
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Ability.
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They're seeking approval In a world
that rewards authenticity, they're
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following blueprints In a world
that rewards innovation, the bigger
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paradigm is your twenties are when
you either learn to think for yourself
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or learn to spend the rest of your
life thinking like everyone else.
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And there are devices in our hands
nowadays that are helping you with
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the ladder far more than the former.
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The choice you make determines
not just your success.
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But ultimately I think your freedom.
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So here's your Whiskered
wisdom for this week.
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The most dangerous lie your
brain will tell you in your
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twenties is you have time.
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Time is not a renewable force, my friends.
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It is the only currency
that really matters.
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So here's your action step forth this
week, tonight, before you go to bed,
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write down three things you are currently
doing that you know are not serving.
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Your future self.
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Three things.
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Maybe you're tolerating, three
things you're avoiding, and or
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three things that you're postponing,
then tomorrow disappoint.
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One of those three things.
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Say no, walk away or start.
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The goal here is to stop participating
in your own diminishment.
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Your twenties are gonna end whether
you use them or whether you waste them.
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The only question is, will
you look back with pride?
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Oh, you look back with regret.
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Listen, every single person who's built
something meaningful had to face each of
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these truths at some point in their life.
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The only difference between
those who thrive and those who
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survive is when they face them.
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Period.
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End story, hard.
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Stop, mic drop.
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You can face them now in your twenties
when you still have time to course
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correct, or you could face them later,
your thirties, your forties, your
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fifties, when the compounding cost
of waiting has already been paid.
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The choice is yours,
but choose consciously.
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Choose wisely because not
choosing well, as we all know,
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it's really still the choice.
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It's just choosing to let life
happen to you instead of creating
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the life that you actually want.
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The one that you dream and
desire, and I think you deserve
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your future self is watching.
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Make them proud.
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And with that, I'm gonna leave
you as I always do, think
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successfully and take action.
